THE WORLD OF BLOGGING NOBODY SEES

I don't want to come across as a negative Nancy, but I want to keep it real with you. A lot of people, followers, family members and the press, believe that the world of blogging is some what glamourous. That bloggers have it easy. We hardly work, we get so much for free and we sort of sail through life without a care in the world. For some bloggers that may be true but for me, it really isn't..

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy & I love my life. I am forever grateful for the opportunities I get, the brands I work with and being able to enjoy my work. But with every job, some days are hard - sometimes those days are f***ing difficult and I wanted to share with you a side of blogging that the majority don't get to see.

Hate & Negativity

Being a blogger means we are pretty much a gateway for online abuse. Tweets, comments, emails & forums - you bloody name it. I've had my fair share of abuse and although we can sit here and say 'just ignore it', 'rise above it' and 'they're only jealous', sometimes those words hurt, they can hurt a lot. Yup, you do get used to it and I am pretty much numb to it all now but it doesn't mean its okay. Its really disheartening and unmotivating to spend hours, days, even weeks producing content you're proud of only to receive a bunch of negative comments. An opinion, a lip colour, a change of hair can cause so much online abuse that its hard to even understand. The scale of the negativity bloggers have to face is pretty hard to bare. It wouldn't happen in a 'normal' job, yet we are made to feel like 'you chose to do this so negativity and abuse is just what comes with it'. Many of my blogger friends have stopped blogging due to the amount of online abuse they have received which is sad. Of course they're are hundreds and thousands of positive comments but at times, its hard to see how that can outweigh all the negativity..

Chasing Invoices/Payments

Im pretty sure companies or brands don't understand that bloggers have financial responsibilities just like them. Phone bills, council tax, rent, food, to name but a few and yet we can spend weeks, in some cases months, chasing people so that we can afford to live. Im not even joking, one month I genuinely struggled to put food in my mouth because I was owed so much money. Being freelance isn't easy. You are constantly wondering 'will I get paid on time'. For someone like me who suffers with anxiety it can be so difficult to get through my day knowing I have bills coming out with not enough funds to cover them. Sometimes it looks like us bloggers earn so much money and lead extravagant lifestyles, I can't speak for everyone but thats just not how it always is.

Stress

Ive suffered with stress for as long as I can remember but becoming a full-time blogger and running my own business in a sense has shown me stress on a whole different scale. There is always so much to be done.. Emails, editing, taking photos, producing sponsored content, deadlines, meetings, phone calls & on top of that cleaning your flat, cooking dinner, having 'you' time and also trying to have a social life. I'm not saying this is all the time, but I feel stressed at least once a month & it drives me insane. Trying to do everything is so draining and there have been times I have made myself ill by trying to please everyone around me. Bloggers in general are in high demand at the moment and boy, do I feel it more than ever. Sometimes I feel like people forget we are humans too. We aren't robots and sometimes we need to just take some time out.

Trying To Be Original, When Everything Has Already Been Done

As creatives, as bloggers, it is SO hard thinking of content ideas that haven't already been done. Its even more annoying thinking of an amazing idea, producing it and then realising someone else has done it a week, month or year before. Theres obviously trends that get us all producing content, fashion week, a new launch etc, but sometimes its just refreshing to think of an idea that is original to you and to the blogging community. As bloggers we can get accused of copying or stealing which is SO frustrating. I've seen so many bitchy tweets from bloggers moaning that another blogger is copying them or stealing their ideas. I get that and sometimes that is probably true. But other times it may be a coincidence or merely that blogger has taken inspiration from you. Sometimes it feels like we can't do anything that someone else has done through fear of comments like 'you are such a copycat', 'you're literally obsessed with her, you buy everything she has' or 'I feel like I've read this before, have you stolen this from someone else'.

Editing, Filters & Angles

Now, I know you all aren't stupid and you understand that bloggers will edit their photos but I think its important to just lay it on the line. WE ALL USE FILTERS & ANGLES, we also might edit our photos too. I often lighten my photos so they are brighter, clearer and fresher looking. When I pose in pictures I will arch my back or put my arms up so my body looks more fluent and in proportion. Why would anyone put up a half decent picture? If you know what works best for you, then work it baby and upload it. There is no shame in admitting that you enhance your photos so that you feel they look better. Bloggers do it, our friends do it and random people we don't know do it. Yes its important to show natural pictures too but being creative and producing photos you're proud of is important to us as well. It takes WERK to get a good photo sometimes, trust me. You haven't seen the struggle of taking 200 selfies and hating every single one lol!

Living Up To Expectations

Now, theres certain expectations that bloggers have somehow created themselves. Quinoa, flowers and candles in the background & a new one on the horizon is marble effect everything? (I bet some of you are laughing right now, I am lol) I sometimes feel like the odd one out, the one that would rather eat cheese on toast than f***ing quinoa? New bloggers or bloggers on the come up probably feel like they need all of those little extras to be a 'real' blogger or to get noticed or to even fit in, but you don't.  These stupid expectations are that.. STUPID. I remember when I first started Youtube, years ago, I would literally go broke trying to look rich, trying to look like everyone else. I would spend £100s a month on items or equipment, anything, so I could fit in and look like other bloggers/vloggers, but then you realise, it doesn't mean anything. I hope I'm not the only one who was caught in the 'living up to expectations' trap.

Loneliness
Being a full-time blogger is amazing. I wouldn't change what I do for anything. However, I spend most of my days alone, sat in my office with only the birds to keep me company. I sometimes really crave social interaction and I often miss being able to talk to other people around me. Most of my friends work in environments where they aren't allowed to be on their phone so if I want a chat during the day I often find myself talking to myself lol, or talking to people on twitter. Blogging can also be very cliquey and I am definitely not in any clique so events and stuff can be quite isolating. I tend to just do my own thing whether on purpose or not so in the end I do feel quite lonely. It can often look like bloggers have incredible social lives and tons of friends but for me its the total opposite.

Learning As We Go

From the outside it looks like we all have our shit together. We know when to sort through our receipts, do all our admin work, how to use editing software, how to write html codes, how to do everything, when reality is, we sometimes have no idea. When I was first catapulted into the world of social media and started to really take what I were doing seriously, I genuinely had no clue what I was doing, with some things I still don't. I had to teach myself everything. How to edit my videos using snazzy little things on Final Cut Pro X, when to register as self employed, how to take blog photos without the products moving, how to edit photos, how to make more money.. It was freaking hard!!!! Most bloggers learn as they go and when they launch their blog, when they go full-time, we are literally jumping in with our eyes closed. There isn't a blogging guru or teacher that helps you, you just have to learn everything yourself. I remember sitting for hours learning how to use google analytics and do you think I know now? NO I BLOODY DONT. It still confuses me years later.

So thats the world of blogging you may not have seen. Yes its a fantastic place to be but at times it can be hard, frustrating and down right annoying - just like any job right? 

I hope you enjoyed this post as much as I did writing it. x